«
realjusticecoachmcguirk:

cellardoornevermore:

argyleapple:


New still of Chris Pratt in Jurassic World (2015)

i’m a heterosexual man and i’m screaming

Oh my christ

holy shit

realjusticecoachmcguirk:

cellardoornevermore:

argyleapple:

New still of Chris Pratt in Jurassic World (2015)

i’m a heterosexual man and i’m screaming

Oh my christ

holy shit

Tagged as: #jurassic world 
vagiskeletons:

my boss asked me to stop doing this

vagiskeletons:

my boss asked me to stop doing this

eatuntilyoudie:

sometimes i actually get my shit together but then i lose it again like 2 days later

Tagged as: #college life 

unfollower:

tips for college:

  • no 1 cares if you eat alone in the dining hall
  • dont be scared of upperclassmen they dont care
  • dont raise your hand to go to the bathroom 
  • dont bring a handwritten sick note from ur mom
Tagged as: #college life 
I have a GENIUS idea for a TV show. Half cat, half dog. No, no. I already have the perfect name. Get this. “Catdog.” No, don’t worry about how it poops. You’re disgusting. This is a kid’s show.
- Someone at nickelodeon like 20 years ago (via craickills)
Tagged as: #childhood 

marcoereus:

I’m so tired of people telling me German is an “ugly, angry” language. When my German teacher tells us jokes it’s the sweetest, happiest language in the world. When I teach my father the word for daughter he smiles, repeating “Tochter” to himself until he gets it right, and in that moment German sounds like pride. There’s nothing angry or ugly about a language that never says goodbye, only “until we meet again.”

Tagged as: #sweet 
familyfriendlyporno:

this is a lot to take in all at once

familyfriendlyporno:

this is a lot to take in all at once

beahbeah:

this website SAVED MY BRAIN when i was a stressed out college student who couldn’t stop flipping out long enough to prioritize. quite a few of you are still suffering through college so i hope this helps you too!! c:

pleasestopdoingthat:

easterbunnymundlover:

leviisacutelittleshit:

colourfulpantsandarainbowhat:

beggars-opera:

colourfulpantsandarainbowhat:

WHY DO PEOPLE CALL IT FUCK, MARRY, KILL WHEN THEY COULD CALL IT BED, WED, BEHEAD

easy there henry

whos henry what thef uck?

*faint laughter from Britian*

image

*quietly sings* divorced, beheaded and died. Divorced, beheaded, survived.

Tagged as: #ehehehe 

tuucker:

irisowl:

So I walked into the dentist this morning. My dentist asked me how my weekend was. I said “Good, I watched Captain America last night. I really liked it.” And my dentist says “Oh, my son is in that movie.” At first I thought he was joking but then I realized

Dr. Robert Evans

I looked it up

My dentist is Captain America’s dad

My doctor is JK Rowling’s husband.

JK Rowling’s husband has asked me if I am sexually active.

colfer-to-my-criss:

Your face, sir

colfer-to-my-criss:

Your face, sir

Tagged as: #asshat 

»